Adventures in Parenting

1 month in

2012-02-01T09:38:00.000-05:00

So it has been a month since joining weight watchers. I am down 10.8 pounds. I am feeling better about myself and I am hoping that the doctor will see how hard I am working at this. It is HARD, I love junk and it is a battle everyday to say no and eat something healthy instead. I am moving along one meal at a time and I am not giving up on myself.

Decisions

2011-12-31T02:46:00.001-05:00

It is 2:30 in the morning and I am at work. There is a weight watcher meeting at 7:30am and I will be there. I have made my decision for myself that I have to do something. I AM FAT!I AM NOT HEALTHY.I DON'T WANT TO DIE.So for myself I am ready to make changes in my life. I guess I am going to start blogging again as well so I have a place to write out all the things I might not be able to say in real life. I may start a new blog jut for the weight loss stuff, we will see. Anyway Hi to anyone who is still out there checking in once in a while.

Numbers

2011-12-29T19:12:00.000-05:00

268
43
160/90

Numbers that make me feel like crying and apparently blogging.

AssVice needed

2010-11-12T15:26:00.000-05:00

So girlfriends I have questions. These are some child rearing questions that I really need some feedback on as we are at a loss around here.

How do I get Jayden to sleep in his own damn bed? He is driving us crazy, now understand with both are up before the sun during the week so simply letting his cry it out is not gonna work for us. I know we have tried many times. Keep in mind he is 2½ years old and very very stubborn.
Terrell is a very hard sleeper, so much so that frequent accidents are happening at night. He was doing really good for a bit but suddenly we are back to wetting most nights. He is 7½ and I am not keen on putting him back into underjams at night as I felt that when he was in them he knew it so he would just let it flow so to speak. We have tried to wake him at night but again we are all in bed most nights by 9 at the latest.

Help! Between the laundry and the sleepless nights I am lossing it!

2010-11-08T17:36:00.000-05:00

So I said in an earlier post that I am working on making an effort within my marriage. Tony and I are both trying. One of the smallest things we have been doing is kissing. No not just that passing by give a little peck kinda kiss but a real live french kiss. For me it is about putting a bit more spark and closeness into our relationship. Not sure what he thinks about it as I haven't asked but the sex has been better! He has also made an effort this past week to not drink any hard liquor, it has made a major difference in his attitude and temperment. I told him I like him much better this way. I am not sure if he relizes that I am making small changes in an effort to effect a bigger change within our relationship but it seems to be working a bit at a time. I will keep you all posted.

Little League

2010-11-05T13:18:00.000-04:00

The last game of the LL season we did not have enough players from the other team so up. What to do but play kids versus parents. It was so much fun even if all the mom's had flip flops on.

Terrell's whole team

Jayden at bat

Mom at bat

T running to first

2010-11-04T15:37:00.000-04:00

So where to start? Well things are good at work, I am learning more and more everyday about the accounting and sales stuff. I just did my first power point presentation and I think it was really good. Don't get me wrong I still find time to go on Facebook and check mt Farmville everyday but I get my work done first.

My oldest sister recently got in contact with Zephra and I on Facebook. It was a bit of a shock but in a good way. She is 9 years older than me and I think I look like her. I am slowly learning about her and trying to forge a relationship with her. It is not the instant connection I felt with Zephra but I think that is due to the fact that I have more memories of Zephra than Patty.

The kids are awesome! Jayden tries my nerves most everyday, LOL. I swear he is payback for everything I did growing up. We are still trying to get him to sleep in his own bed, but that is for another post. Terrell is getting so big, he has a friend the same age who lives down the street and they are together all the time. I thought I had a few more years before he abandoned me for his friends. It is amazing to watch him grow and bloom into a young man.

As for the DH things are ok. Not as bad as they once were but not as good as I wish they were. I guess we are just a work in progress.

It's been a long time

2010-11-03T18:43:00.002-04:00

I haven't posted to my blog since April. I think I lost my blogging mojo for a while. I have been thinking about blogging again for the last few weeks so here I am. Things are much the same around here. I am still working full time, Tony is still drinking and the kids are still kids. Lots and lots to get out of my head and onto my blog. Anyone still around?

7

2010-04-15T00:06:00.001-04:00

Terrell today you are 7. I can not believe it has gone by so quickly. You are an amazing son, you teach me things about myself that I never knew. You love riding your bike now with no training wheels even if it was hard at first. You are mostly nice to your baby brother. I know it is hard being the oldest and always being expected to do the right thing. Mom and Dad are working on not expecting so much from you in regards to your brother. The year of 6 was full of a lot of changes and new things. We got a new house, you got a new school, new friends, your own bedroom. You learned how to read and you love math. I love watching you play in the yard with your brother when you think I am not looking. Mostly I just love you, you are awesome and I am having the time of my life being your Mom. HAPPY 7th BIRTHDAY T!

Poop Post

2010-04-08T08:38:00.002-04:00

Last night while getting Jayden ready to shower he looked at the toilet and said poop. I said yes poo poo goes in there do you want to try? He nodded and I put him on the big pot. He was too cute, trying to push that poo poo out. A little rabbit turd did make it into the toilet and all rejoiced. I am excited because I know this means he gets the idea of what to do on there. This weekend I am going to work at expanding on this, I will be getting the potty insert for the toilet and hoping I can get him to poop on the pot again.

Wow a whole post about poop, never thought that would happen again.

Fenway his way

2010-04-05T16:56:00.002-04:00

Terrell went to work with his Dad on Saturday, they had to make a delivery at Fenway Park. Terrell got to go inside and walk on the warning track as well as sit in the dugout pretending to call the bullpen. I can seriously say I think it was the single greatest day of my son's young life. He had a smile on his face all day long.

My boys

2010-04-03T07:07:00.002-04:00

Jayden in the backyard being cute

Terrell at Mill creek. I just love this picture of him, I can glimpse my big boy but yet I can still see a glimmer of a little boy

2010-04-02T12:16:00.002-04:00

I am making a commitment today to start blogging more. To be honest I miss it and start to blog but then I have nothing to say. I am obsessed with facebook and farmville and bejeweled blitz and petville. I am loving having a garden and I am so ready for little league to start. I am slowly making time for myself more often and am learning the importance of being good to me first. The kids are doing awesome and even DH and I are doing ok. More soon.....

A quick one

2010-03-15T10:15:00.002-04:00

Yay Yay I know I am a horrible blogger. I just really have nothing going on at the moment that seems very blog worthy. Be prepared if I do start blogging a lot again it is likely to be boring as hell.
So let's see what is new with us? Well Terrell is all signed up for little league and has tryouts on March 27th. We have all been sick and I am hoping that part of winter is over. I did suck it up and went to the museum of science on Saturday. We only stayed about 1½ hours because I started feeling worse. Jayden loved the dinosaur exhibit. He just stared and stared and the T rex. Terrell always enjoys the mathematica displays and both really like the exhibits with the stuffed wildlife, the black bear was a big hit! Tony and I are doing good, it is a process but we are succeeding. All in all things around here are boring but good.

Super T

2010-02-28T14:28:00.003-05:00

Terrell is running around the house today with his Darth Vader cape on. He is a superhero named what else? Super T. He was named student of the month for February for his class. Mom and Dad are so proud, it means he was the most improved academically. WTG Terrell!

In Jayden news, his vocabulary continues to grow by leaps and bounds. His newest word is happy. He sounds so cute when he says it. He also said grandpa this morning, I am pretty sure my Dad was tickled pink by that.

I leave you with a picture of my rug rats eating ice cream:

Mom?

2010-02-23T17:13:00.002-05:00

I'm thinking of changing my name. Lately this is all I hear in my house.............

WTF?

2010-02-12T09:13:00.001-05:00

I went to give blood last night at a local blood drive. I was not eligible to donate. This saddens me greatly. I thought for sure if my iron level was good I would be all set. Turns out my blood pressure was too high 170/104 and on the recheck 150/110. What the hell? They even used the fat people cuff to get a more accurate reading. I am scared and calling my doctor.

dotted post

2010-02-10T12:47:00.002-05:00

I have a bunch of random things to share so bullets are the post of the day.

My sister and I are trying to find a way for me and the boys to visit but damn plane fare is not cheap.
Terrell is doing well in school
except for the fact that the last 2 days he has gotten in trouble for pushing other kids
I took TV away last night but I am not sure why he is doing this
Jayden is talking up a storm and is coming up with new words everyday
the latest is see ya
Tony and I are in a good place right now
for that I am grateful
he is drinking less
I am trying to walk on my treadmill 3 or 4 times a week
I am not always doing it though
both boys need new sneakers
need to find some money for that too
There is a blood drive at the american legion hall tomorrow
I am going to go and donate if I can
I went to my first city council meeting on Monday
better than any soap opera I have ever seen
I had one of the worst migraines ever on Sunday
I finally made an appointment with the neurologist
of course they can't see me till April

I am pretty sure that is everything.

Better

2010-02-05T17:00:00.001-05:00

Just a quick post to say that things are going well here. Really well in fact. We are all adjusting to me working days and it has seemed to help. He is not drinking as often or as much and that is nice. We get along better now too. Not to mention that we get to actually have sex once in a while. Yeah that is a benefit to working days and getting up at 4am. The kids seem happier and god knows I am happier.

ABC....

2010-01-19T10:09:00.003-05:00

as easy as 123. Ok so I suck at titles, sue me. Things are ok in our house. Some-days are much better than others though for the obvious reasons. I have talked to my MIL and while I am grateful for the support I got from her I would have liked a little more in the way of we are going to do A B and C. I guess it could be worse though, his family could be in complete denial. The think I took away the most from our talk was that I should go back to school and get a better job so that I do not have to depend of her son to make a life for me and the boys. All well and good but in reality I am at home at night so that I can see my boys and know that they are ok. Not really sure how I am suppose to pay for school and a sitter so I can go get me an education. Oh yeah did I mention that I in no way want to go back to school and that I have a career in hotels? Yeah this is what I want to do with my life. Not glamorous but it is what makes me happy. So all in all I got no real help from them but we are going to sit down and talk to him when they come to visit in July.

If I last that long............

Found it

2010-01-06T11:25:00.002-05:00

I have found an AlAnon meeting. It meets at the church right down the street from me on Saturdays at noon. Now to get up my courage to actually go to the meeting. I am scared and nervous. I know I have to go but making that first step is gonna be hard for me. Anyone want to tag along?

Mornings

2010-01-04T13:18:00.001-05:00

I started the day shift today. So far so good. Getting up and getting everyone out the door was not so bad. I think it helped that everything was out and ready for me too. My SIL talked to her Dad this weekend too and let him and Mom know what is going on with Tony. Saturday was good but again yesterday he was drinking. He gets what I like to call grumpy when he drinks and I just hate it. The whole family is going to get in on a conference call or something and try to figure out what to do. If you are of the praying sort a little pray to the big guy would be great. I have a feeling it is going to be a rough few months ahead of us.

2009-12-30T18:22:00.002-05:00

Sorry for the lack of a post this past week. Christmas was nice, the kids were happy with all the goods and Mom and Dad were too. Got me a super duper new toaster oven. Woot, can't beat that!
The boys got way to much but what else is new? Terrell is really enjoying his new football and Jayden loves all the cars and trucks they got. Jayden has a new word, well that is not really true he has a ton of new words. Cold is the one he uses the most right now and snow. Yesterday when changing his clothes he was flopping around and I asked what was wrong and out popped COLD! It is so funny to hear him talking this much.

Terrell is enjoying his week off of school and has been staying up late and sleeping in. Which means Mom get to sleep in too. Starting on Monday I go on days and will be up at 4:30am and out of the house at 5:15am to get the kids to the sitter and me to work by6. Then off at 2 and rush home to pick both boys up, T from school and J from the sitter. God help me the first couple of weeks are gonna be hard.

I am working for NYE and still debating if I am staying at the hotel after my shift or if I am gonna go home. Guess I need to figure it out soon. What are your new year's plans?

Christmas Meme

2009-12-21T19:37:00.002-05:00

I borrowed this from Slaying, Blogging, Whatever....

Welcome to the Christmas edition of getting to know your friends. Okay, here's what you're supposed to do, and try not to be a SCROOGE!!! Just copy this entire post. Change all the answers so that they apply to you. Then post this on your blog.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper

2. Real tree or Artificial? Artificial I can never remember to water the real ones

3. When do you put up the tree? My first day off after Thanksgiving

4. When do you take the tree down? First day off after New Years

5. Do you like eggnog? Yes, in fact in my house it is called egg milk

6. Favorite gift received as a child? I can't remember, Barbies probably

7. Hardest person to buy for? Susan

8. Easiest person to buy for? The kids

9. Do you have a nativity scene? No but not cause I don't want one. I am looking for a Black nativity scene but can't find one I can afford.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail.

11. Worst Christmas ever? My first or second one with Tony when he did not wrap any of my gifts and gave them all to me in Walmart bags.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie(s)? Miracle on 34th Street

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? December

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Doesn't everyone?

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Fudge and ribbon candy

16. Lights on the tree? Yes colored but not blinking

17. Favorite Christmas song? love them all

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Home

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Maybe

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? One gift on Christmas eve all the rest after Santa comes

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Traffic

23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Snowmen

24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Ham, mac and cheese homemade of course and Greens

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? new camera and some new pajama bottoms

Now it's your turn. If you play, please leave me the link so I can read your answers.

Proud Mommy

2009-12-16T18:39:00.001-05:00

Today Terrell's school had a little holiday concert. Kindergarten sang 2 songs then 1st grade had 2 and 2nd grade did the final two. Terrell is in first grade and it was so cute to see him up there singing his little heart out. This morning he was so excited he was up before the alarm clock raring to go. His whole face just lit up when he saw me and Jayden and his godfather John sitting in the audience. I wish I could post a cute picture of him on the stage singing but the little girl in front of him had on reindeer antlers and they were blocking his face. Oh well I have the memory in my heart as well as on cell phone video.

Solutions

2009-12-15T10:30:00.002-05:00

I have spoken with the sitter and she is agreeable to watching the kids during the day. She would be able to take Tbone to school for me and then watch Jayden all day. This is such a weight lifted from my shoulders. I actually cried when she told me last night. She is willing to do it for $75.00 a week, which amounts to $15.00 a day. That is awesome but at the same time it is still a lot of money. Tony is looking into our finances to see if we can afford it, little does he know we will find a way even if I need to have no spending money at all. I am hoping we figure this out quickly because I am ready to be home with the boys at night. I want to thank you all for your support, it means a lot to me.

CHRISTMAS PICTURE 2009

2009-12-10T17:05:00.002-05:00

2009-12-09T15:40:00.001-05:00

We had lunch today and really had a good talk. She is going to talk to her parents about what is going on. In the mean time I am going to try to figure out a way to go on days so I can be home with the kids at night. We will see what happens. Hope it works out.

Big things are happening

2009-12-08T21:17:00.002-05:00

My SIL is here visiting. Surprisingly this has been a very nice trip. We are going to have lunch together tomorrow just us girls. We need too, we have a lot to talk about. I have come to the conclusion after a very long time that my husband is an alcoholic. I am pretty sure of it and I think my sister in law believes it as well. Be ready it seems this blog is about to be active again. I am looking into finding Al Anon meeting in my area and also seeing what I can find out about our insurance covering counseling for me and maybe him if I can ever convince him to do it. I need to find a way to deal with this while not also messing my kids up for life. Wish me luck.

18 Month checkup

2009-11-16T16:33:00.002-05:00

Jayden had his 18 month check up today. He is 26.2 pounds and 36.6 inches long. He is doing great. He got 4 shots which he was none to happy about at all. He did not even like the doctor touching him today. He screamed each time Dr. P came near him. Poor guy had a traumatizing day to say the least. He is home with Daddy now and hopefully we will not have any reactions to the DPT shot tonight. I thought I would add to his lst of words he says now, in addition to the ones from the last post we also now say:

Sponge bob ( yeah I know he is too young to watch TV)
Foot ball
Car
dinty ( for his binky)

It is amazing how much bigger his vocabulary is in just a few days time.

Terrell is doing great, he loves school but the whole having an attitude things is getting a little old for me. What the hell I did not expect this out of a 6 year old. Any advice?

My birthday is in a few days and I am so excited because I am getting a new cell phone. I am getting the LG touch. I can't wait to play with it. That is all that is new in my world. What is new in yours?

Words

2009-10-30T17:17:00.002-04:00

I just want to write down a list of words that Jayden is saying now.

Dada
Mama
Cat
Scarecrow
west side ( don't ask, it is a Dad thing)
That
Down
Peees aka Please but he hardly ever says it
Bro bro for Terrell
No no no
uh oh

I know there are more but I can not think of them right now.

School pictures 2009-10

2009-10-28T17:21:00.002-04:00

Ghost?

2009-10-19T16:14:00.002-04:00

Yesterday evening I checked in a guest at the hotel who is a paranormal investigator. His name is Christopher Moon. We have a sign up that says haunted hotel, he asked if it was true and I said some of the overnight people say yes. He then told us who he was and that he would let us know in the morning if anything or anyone was about. Turns out we have a little girl ghost. She was in the area near the vending machines, pacing back and forth. I am pretty sure we have another ghost here as the girls all feel a male presence. I am thinking of emailing him to see if he would come back next time he is in the area. How freaking cool is that?

2009-10-06T12:27:00.001-04:00

Just stopping in to say Hi and let you all know I am still around. Work is busy busy busy. I have my only day off tomorrow and we are hoping to get to the fair after school. Other than that all is well in our house. How are things with you?

A word.....

2009-09-28T20:25:00.002-04:00

I am making a serious effort to not get stressed out about things at work. It is hard for me but I am really trying. They just don't pay me enough to give myself an ulcer people. Things still are stressful but I am trying very hard to step back and not worry about them.

Things at home are going well. We are all for the most part settling into a routine of sorts. Terrell loves school and is hyped up about learning how to read. The librarian came into his classroom and read them a short story called Christmas in the big woods by Laura Ingalls Wilder. He comes home telling me about it so of course I had to pull out my collection of her books. We have started reading the first one together. It gives me a special thrill to read it with him as it was one of my favorite books growing up. It is a memory I will cherish and I hope he does too. He has been doing great on his first few spelling tests and he makes me proud everyday.

Jayden is just Jayden, the little spawn child. He is into everything but is so cute you can't stay mad. Like today when he spilled my ice coffee and was trying to clean it up with a tiny little paper towel, how freaking cute. He got new sneakers yesterday, light up ones and it is funny to watch him busily looking at his feet watching for the lights. What the hell was I thinking when I bought those?

We have a new family pet too. Tony still will not agree to a dog so we bought a Gerbil. Technically she is Terrell's but he is willing to share a bit. He has named her Sweety and she is really cute. I just wish her little plastic wheel was quieter at night.

I Hate............

2009-09-17T16:31:00.001-04:00

my job some days
my boss some days
the stress everyday
that I cry at work

Day after Labor Day Blues

2009-09-08T22:01:00.001-04:00

Ugh Today at work has felt like a Monday and has been twice as bad. I am glad my day is almost over and I am going home to bed. Now if my DH can stay off my nerves all will be good in my book. Just needed to get that off my chest.

More Random stuff

2009-08-31T20:55:00.003-04:00

Some much random shit is floating around in my head so I thought what the heck write a blog post. I know how much my one or two readers enjoy reading the randomness that rattles around in my almost empty brain. So here for your reading enjoyment bullets.

Terrell is loving 1st grade so far
Jayden is now know as the destroyer
Jayden has figured out how to take those little plastic outlet covers out of the outlets
He can also turn the doorknob to the basement door
Thank god we have a chain lock on the door
Of course that means if you are down there and someone is upstairs with him they have to lock you in the basement
So glad we child proofed the house
Jayden also fell down the front stairs of the house, yes the concrete stairs, I swear I was right there the little guy is quick!
Terrell is really starting to grow up right before my eyes
It is making me sad
This morning when dropping him off at school he kissed me and gave me a hug then said bye Mom see you tomorrow
I miss my boy
I HATE HATE HATE working nights
My sister is close to possibly making her first home sale
I am so proud of her
My sister in law is coming to visit in November
AGAIN
she was just here in May
and before that in September
This is the most she has ever visited
I need to go check my farm on facebook now so that is all

School's Back!

2009-08-28T11:49:00.003-04:00

So yesterday Terrell started 1st grade. Wow the summer went by really fast here. Of course Revere did go back earlier than many of the surrounding towns. His teacher is young and new. She is a 1st year teacher, I think this is good and bad. Good because she will not be jaded yet, will be excited and enthusiastic. Not so good because she has no real experience yet and this year will be a learning year for her. I wonder will my child not get as strong of an education because of it? On the plus side she does not yet own anything that says #1 teacher so Christmas and end of year gifts should be a snap. I am not going to pass judgment on her yet because hey everyone was a new teacher once right? I will sit back and see how the year goes, oh yeah did I mention that she is hot? Yeah I am sure all the fathers are gonna love her!

So far Terrell likes school. Let's all hope he makes some friends that live close by soon.

2009-08-20T21:35:00.000-04:00

I feel like I have lost my blogging mojo. It seems like I have nothing to write. Terrell goes back to school next Thursday and that makes me so sad. Our anniversary is Sunday and we are not doing anything special. Just another boring day. I promise I will get back to blogging again soon.

Momma Drama

2009-08-11T11:28:00.003-04:00

I made a decision not to write a letter to my mother. I have decided that I really don't care to open myself up to that kind of rejection again. My sister will pass along any medical information she may receive so what is the point? It will be better for my mental well being and for my families general well being. you know the old saying if momma ain't happy nobody is happy. Yeah well that has been my house the last few weekends so I have made a decision that will make us all happy. This concludes the Momma drama for me.

no title

2009-07-31T20:31:00.004-04:00

My sister did an online search for our mother the other day while under the influence of ambien. Without going into the whole sordid back story my mother left when I was 6 and Sis was 2 in fact I may have still been 5. She left us without a backward glance and it was many years and a search using her social security # before I had contact with her again. At that point I was the "bad child" and I believe not wanted in either household, so I ran away and kept running time after time. I tried drugs, I sold my body, I had a child I gave up for adoption, I was beaten by my step mother badly. I was raised by alcholics. Mothers are supposed to care for and protect their children, mine didn't. She is a coward and a bitch. I feel I need to tell her this, So I think at some point this weekend I will sit down and tell her how my life was hell for many years. I believe alot of it started when she turned her back on her children one day in 1976 and it got worse for many many years but I also want her to know that in spite of that I made something of my self and I am a better mother than she could have ever hoped to be because of the crap and bullshit I have waded through my whole life. The only thing I want or need from her is a complete medical history after that she is dead to me, hell right now she is dead to me for the most part.

2009-07-28T17:17:00.003-04:00

We spent the day today at the pool with my friend Lisa. The kids all had a blast. Jayden took to it like a fish. Terrell never got out unless he had to go to the bathroom or eat. It was so much fun. We just lazed around and hung out, just what I needed.

Let me tell you about my night. I get home and as I am getting out of the car a cop is walking up to my door. I was on the phone with my sister so I hang up and get out. He asks if this is my house I say yes and we go in. At this point I am pretty sure I know why he is hear because you can hear Jayden screaming bloody murder. You see it is summer and the windows in his room were open, Tony put him in his bed asleep. Now normal he will sleep until midnight or later before waking but for some reason he woke up last night early. Tony had take an ambien, forgotten to turn on the baby monitor and had the AC on in our room. He did not hear the baby. I had to prove to the police man that I did not leave my kids home alone while I was at work. I had to actually show him Tony in bed and then wake him up. At first I was not upset because I figure the neighbor was just worried but the more I think about it the more upset I get. He could not have been crying for all that long becase Tony texted me last night at 9:30pm that he was going to bed. This all went down about 11:15. For the love of god does this person not know that kids cry? I hope she doesn't think he is never going to cry or scream again because he is the spawn and screaming is his favorite thing to do.

Another Milestone

2009-07-27T19:39:00.001-04:00

Yesterday Terrell lost his first tooth! I can not believe how big my son is getting. It seems like all these milestones are coming way to fast for me. I wish I could slow him down just a little bit. It was his bottom right tooth, the tooth fairy brought him $5. He was so proud and happy this morning when he woke up to find that money.

Broken

2009-07-17T20:15:00.000-04:00

Grandpa Al passed away today. My heart is broken. He was a surrogate father to my DH and a all around great guy. He was the first person to ever sing a song to Terrell. I can't believe he is gone and we did not even get to say goodbye.You will be missed Al. We love you

First Haircut

2009-07-15T12:33:00.003-04:00

Before

No Idea what is about to happen

Holy crap what are you doing to me?

After

2009-07-14T19:40:00.003-04:00

It is amazing the sun has been shining for about 4 straight days. The children are happy, the mom is happy, all is right with the world. We have been spending some time outside everyday. We go to this park down the street from our house and the kids really like it. Jayden now loves to go down the slide and play on the seesaw. Terrell is making some friends and loves to play with Jayden too. The kids get a free lunch and that is nice. Most of the parents seem really nice too, not at all like the clicky parents in Winthrop. All in all we are really starting to enjoy being in a new area. Terrell is just loving having his own room and his own back yard. He is out there most days. He is also growing a sunflower that is coming along nicely. Pictures of it to come.

Loose

2009-07-09T19:15:00.002-04:00

This morning we went to the park since the sun was finally shining again. The city we moved to gives all kids 18 and under free lunch Monday to Friday at the local parks. Today was hot dog and apple day. Well while T was eating his apple he said it hurt his tooth. We thought nothing of it and continued our day. Once we got home Terrell was thrilled to discover his tooth is now wiggly. He is so excited about losing a tooth. Once we called all the aunties and told Dad we really looked in his mouth, you can see the new teeth coming through the gums behind his baby teeth. My boy really is growing up.

2009-07-08T20:39:00.001-04:00

For some reason I m extra bitchy tonight. Not sure why but people are irritating the hell out of me. If one more person tells me to cheer up I am going to cheerfully rip there head off. That is all.

Bullets

2009-07-01T21:12:00.001-04:00

I just wanted to quickly post some things. Nothing that amounts to a full post so here it is in bullet form.

Jayden rubs his hair to fall asleep
He also rubs mine if I am near
He fell asleep in his bed last night with no tears
We went to the park down the street from the house
It was nice
I knew one person from Terrell's old school
He introduced me to a few moms
They do free lunch M-F in the park for all the kids
Terrell is really loving the new house
He wants to be in the back yard all the time
He loves that he gets to ride his bike in the street if Mom or Dad are with him.
Today he went into Dunkin Donuts all by himself to buy a donut
He was so proud, it was cute
Jayden has taken to giving kisses to people
Big wet slobbery kisses
I love it!
I can not believe it is July already
Will we ever have summer around here?
Can you tell me what the sun looks like?
I am starting to forget

Home ownership woes

2009-06-29T20:23:00.001-04:00

Well it is official, we have not even lived in the house for a full month yet and already things are breaking. First Tony clogged up the sink drain. Then this morning I was awakened by a little drip drip drip. Seems the ceiling in our bedroom is leaking. We think it may be the flashing around Terrell's bedroom window. Ahh the joys of owning your own home.

School is out!

2009-06-23T12:09:00.001-04:00

Woo hoo it is officially summer in my house now. No more 7am wake ups and more time to spend with T. I can not believe I am the mother of a 1st grader now!

2009-06-22T11:22:00.003-04:00

I was all excited this morning. Why you ask? Well tomorrow is the last day of school so no more of that pesky alarm clock waking me up. More importantly though I thought I found the USB cord to my camera. Ummm yeah so much for that. I have 1st birthday pictures and park pictures from back in April plus pictures from my niece and her daughter being here the other night. I just want to upload my pictures dammit! Not to mention I would like to take some pictures of the house and post them now that we are in for real. so instead of showing you a bunch of pictures this is all you get.

NOT

2009-06-10T11:14:00.001-04:00

It is not the swine flu! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!

Update

2009-06-09T20:47:00.002-04:00

We are all moved in and I am slowly unpacking. I love my house! I have just laid in my bed and marveled at how quiet it is. All the neighbors we have met so far seem really nice. Jayden has been sleeping through the night in his room all alone. Hallelujah! OK so I admit he is asleep when he goes into his room but he stays there all night so I don't care. This morning I did the dishes while watching 3 Robin birds eat worms out of my yard, sure beats the hell out of looking at a wall. If and when I finally unpack the camera I promise to take pictures.

In other news Terrell is sick AGAIN! This has been quite a year with the sickness. They are pretty sure he has the flu, we are waiting for the lab results but the doctor said it is most likely the swine flu. Great just great, where in the hell did my kid get that from? So he will be home for the next 5 days or so. The doctor gave him Tamiflu, no generic version so our copay was $35 at CVS.

Anyway that is what is going on around here, what is new with you?

2009-06-03T18:26:00.003-04:00

Still alive over here. Tired as all get out though. The house is now clean except for the floors which I will do after the men track dirt all over. I am so ready to move and yet I am sad. This apartment is where my kids were born, it is the first and only home they have ever known. J will not remember but T will. It is where my life changed for the better. It is our first place together. I am looking forward to creating new memories in our new home. It is just sad letting go of this old apartment. I know I am going to cry on moving day, hell I am crying as I type this. Anyway we are around just really busy, once the insanity slows down I will be back to commenting I promise.

New House

2009-05-29T17:34:00.003-04:00

We closed on the house Tuesday. It was a long and boring process and I am glad it is over. I love our new house and can not wait to move in next weekend. This weekend is devoted to cleaning the new house and painting it. How come no one told me that fridges, washers and dryers are mostly special order and I am going to live for a week with no fridge upstairs? Tony did go buy a used fridge for our basement. I also need to finish packing, work 40 hours, mother 2 kids, clean a house, do laundry and move in the next week. Sis get you butt up here and help me. So if I don't blog for a few days you will know why, it means I am buried under piles of boxes. Pictures of the house will be coming soon.

1 year pictures

2009-05-25T18:30:00.004-04:00

1 YEAR

2009-05-23T08:11:00.002-04:00

One year ago today at 8:11am Terrell became a big brother. Jayden was very much wanted and loved from the moment we decided to have another baby. Through all the ups and downs of infertility having a little person again is what kept me going. He was 7 pounds 11 ounces and just beautiful. I can not imagine our family without him in it. Terrell loves being the big brother and teaching J all kinds of fun stuff. My husband loves being a Dad and gets special pleasure out of the fact that J prefers him to anyone else. I love being a Mom to 2 boys. The days when they both climb on my lap and cuddle are my favorites. Jayden is so big now, walking all around. Playing with us and laughing like a crazy man. He has 7 teeth now and his 1 year molars are coming in too. It is hard for me to believe that he has been here for a year already, it seems like only yesterday he looked like this:

And now he looks like this:

Great Changes

2009-05-22T19:11:00.002-04:00

You know I did not think about this before my sister said it but this year has been a year of great changes. First Terrell went to kindergarten, Jayden was born and now we are buying a house. Wow we have been busy.

We are set to do our walk through on Monday and close Tuesday morning. We are pleasantly surprised that our closing costs are lower than we thought they would be. Good for us because now we can afford to do things like buy groceries and diapers. I really need to get on the ball with the packing. I guess it will seem more real to me once we have closed.

Another post coming tomorrow as it will be Jayden's first birthday.

Shades of gray

2009-05-19T19:07:00.002-04:00

One day last week I was looking in the mirror when I saw it. I could not believe it. In fact I did not want to believe it. It seems at the age of 38 I have my first gray hair. I was so convinced it was blond and not gray that I found my tweezers and plucked it out to look at it closer. Than I plucked out a regular hair to compare, yup it was definitely gray. My friend Lisa just told me that I have a bunch of grays in the back of my head too but if I can't see them they don't count. I will have to get some hair color the next time I am in Target.

2 Weeks

2009-05-12T17:23:00.002-04:00

Yup that's right in 2 weeks we will be home owners. I still can't believe it really. It seems like a distant goal not one that is happening so soon. I am taking the day of closing off and as soon as T gets out of school I told him we will go over to our new house and run around in it. I told my husband that when we close I think that is the moment I will really feel like a grown up. Wow 2 kids and 10 years of marriage but this is the big one. We have settled on June 6th to move. So tell me what did you do first in your new house?

Walker

2009-05-04T17:25:00.002-04:00

We have a walker! Jayden took his first steps on Saturday May 2nd. Mommy, Daddy and big brother are all so proud! to see video look HERE

Accomplishments

2009-04-30T18:02:00.002-04:00

Well for the last few days Jayden has been standing up by himself off and on. Today he may have even taken his first step. I am not sure if I should count it or not because it was more like a tumble than a step. What do you guys think?

Terrell was pretty sick the last part of last week and all weekend. He is doing much better now, and no it is not the sw1ne flu. He had something viral and it was bad. 103.5 fevers and lots of sleeping. Of course once I took him to the doctor he started to get better. Isn't that always the way?

My SIL is visiting again. She was just here in September, then we saw her in November during our trip to California. Now she is talking about coming back in June to see the new house. God love her this is the most she has ever visited us.

11 Months old

2009-04-23T20:14:00.004-04:00

Jayden is 11 months old today. It is hard for me to believe in one short month he will be a year old. I look back now and envy life before he was here because Terrell was so self sufficient but I can not imagine our family without Jayden in it. He has brought extra love and joy to all of us. Today I was sleeping and Jayden woke up, his big brother came and got him and took him in the living room so I could sleep. Of course I was awake enough to know he was with T but it was so sweet. He loves his big brother and follows him around everywhere. For words we now have Dada, Tttt for Terrell, Cat, baba, ball well he doesn't quite say ball but we know what he means. No walking yet but boy are we getting close.

Birthday #6

2009-04-15T07:29:00.005-04:00

6 years ago at 7:53am my life changed forever. That is when we welcomed Terrell into our family. Now it is 6 years later and I could not be prouder to say I am his Mommy. He is a thoughtful, polite little boy. He is sweet most of the time and still likes to cuddle me, although not as often. I will be sad when that ends all together. He has many friends and has never met a stranger. We have already been out of the house this morning for our traditional birthday breakfast at the coffee shop. He told everyone he encountered that it was his birthday. We are so very lucky that he is ours and I could not imagine life without him. Happy Birthday Terrell. We love you!

2009-04-13T15:04:00.002-04:00

Umm so I have no excuse for not blogging, I just had nothing worth writing about happening. We have now pasted our first Easter as a family of 4 and it was fun. My zoloft has kicked in but good and I no longer want to kill my husband on a daily basis. We are only 2 days from T's 6th birthday, and sometime in the next 2 months we will own a home. Life is good. Jayden wants to walk but is scared to let go. Terrell is obsessed with Tech Decks and is praying for one for his birthday. I will be back in 2 days with the big birthday post.

Small update

2009-03-31T21:37:00.002-04:00

Wow It feels like I have not blogged in forever. Just living life nothing exciting is going on around here. Well except for Tony's back window of his car shattering yesterday on his way home. Did I mention that my babies were in the backseat at the time? No one was hurt but Tony and Jayden were both shook up. Tbone on the other hand said it was no big deal.

We went to a birthday party this past Saturday at Bonkers. T had a blast except for when he lost me. I was very proud of him though. They made us move from the party area and I thought he saw where we were moving to. Turns out I was wrong, he could not find me and got scared BUT he did what Mom has always told him to do. He found a grownup who worked there and told her he had lost his Mom. As they were walking over to the main desk he saw me. He was mad but boy was Mom proud. See he really does listen to me sometimes.

Jayden is growing by leaps and bounds too. He can now climb onto a small chair. He is getting into a biting stage though and I do not know what to do. He bit me twice over the weekend. When you say NO loudly and with force he laughs. Ask my sister she has heard it. He is too little for the bite back thing to work and I have no ideas on what to try to stop the biting. BTW we are not breastfeeding, he bit my leg and my face.

Terrell will be 6 in 2 weeks and he is very excited to have a party. He keeps talking about tech decks too. Guess we are gonna have to buy some of those for him. He is doing great in school but we are having some minor problems at home with listening. I am sure it is just normal 6 year old boy crap.

I am doing good, Zoloft seems to be kicking in cause when DH tried to pick a fight this weekend I let it roll off my back. Work sucks right now though and I wish I didn't need to work. UGH oh well what can you do?

10 months old

2009-03-23T19:18:00.002-04:00

Well Jayden has hit that magically 10 month mark. He brought it in with a fever over the weekend ranging from 101.6 to 103.4. No other symptoms so I am not sure what is going on with him. Teeth maybe? He has a new word too, he says cat now. If you say to him J where is the kitkat he will say cat cat cat over and over. It is really cute but I wish he would say momma already. He is cruising the furniture even more now and has briefly stood on his own a few times. He is mostly a happy baby but he is very clingy when he does not feel good. I basically spent my weekend with a child attached to me at all times. Wow only 2 months until the big 1!

The Fight

2009-03-19T19:32:00.002-04:00

Terrell had his first ever fight at school yesterday. Now a teacher did not tell me this, my son did. Does anyone else see a problem with that? It took my hubby all night last night and me part of the morning to find out what really happened. I guess the boy called my son stupid. So what did T do? He halled off and hit the boy, the boy hit back. The teacher separated them and gave them both timeouts. Once he finally told me this morning that he hit the kid for calling him stupid we had the whole we don't hit people talk. It was so strange because he would not tell me why he hit the boy, he kept saying he did not remember why. I told him he needed to apologize today and shake hands. So standing outside at pick up, I stand near the same lady everyday and we chat a bit. T comes out I ask if he apolized and he says no because I did not see him today. At that moment it dawns on me the boys name is the same as the lady next to me's son. Yup what are the chances that one of the only parents I like at this school is the one my kid has to fight with? So the boys said sorry and shook hands and they both seemed fine. Thank god his Mom was cool too.

more and more bullets

2009-03-18T17:50:00.006-04:00

Sorry for the lack of posting. It is not that I don't have stuff to say it is that I forget to blog. So forgive me but a bullet update is the only way to do this.

Jayden stood up today unassisted for the first and second time.
Each time it was only for about 10 seconds but I am over the moon with happiness.
Tbone is getting all excited about his 6th birthday
We are trying to figure out what to do for it
My best friend is house hunting so I went to a few open houses last Sunday
Seeing what some of these homes look like make me extra glad I found an awesome home right off the bat
My sister has been off visiting my Dad and I miss talking to her
They have no cell reception out in the boonies
Tony and I have been existing but not really talking the last few days
I think the house stuff is making him nervous
I started taking my Zoloft again
I took T to the park this past weekend and he was mad when it was time to go
I told him in the car that I had fun with him, he said I did not have fun with you!
He had a stern talking too from Daddy and later apologized for hurting my feelings.
Damn ungrateful kids
Took them both to the park the next day and Jayden wanted no part of it
not the swing or the slide
he would not crawl either, he did not like the feel of the rubber stuff on his hands
I am hoping to get back to the park again this weekend

House Update

2009-03-12T10:46:00.002-04:00

So as you all know we put in an offer on the house. It was excepted and a few days later we had our home inspection. All looked good so on to the purchase and sale agreement. This is where we hit a snag. We agreed to extend the closing by 30 to 60 days. We even agreed to pay to extend our beautiful wonderful 4.0% rate. Well all I wanted was for this lady to agree to pay to extend it beyond the first 30 days. She did not want to budge. It took a pouty update on my facebook, a call from my awesome realtor and him talking me off the edge to calm me down. He called her realtor and basically said look she needs to give a little or my buyers are gonna walk away. 10 minutes later he gets a call back that she will pay for the second extension. Yeah bitch I thought so. So P&S is signed and it looks like we will be home owners in the next few months. I am scared and joyful at the same time. My mind is moving a thousand miles a minute trying to figure out what to do with our furniture etc once we move in. I have re landscaped the front of the house in my mind as well as completely redone the kitchen. I can not fall asleep sometimes because I am worrying about T making friends at school, J falling down the stairs. How I am going to gate everything off. Ugh, I guess it is a good problem to have though huh? Anyone want to help me back up an apartment we have lived in for over 10 years?

Sickness

2009-03-11T07:35:00.001-04:00

So far today I have been thrown up on, pooped on and stubbed my toe. This was all by 6:30am. Then I got T up, just before he started to eat breakfast he said "Mommy my tummy hurts." Yup he threw up too. How did I get so lucky????

2009-03-09T20:19:00.002-04:00

I am finally feeling better. I had to leave work on Thursday because whatever I had hit me like a ton of bricks. I spent all day Friday in bed minus the time it took to drop off T at school and pick him up. I tried to pawn J off on the sitter but she was sick too. I got lucky though and he slept for 2 hours with me in the morning. It could have been so much worse.

I did drag my butt out of bed on Saturday for 2 reasons. We had home inspection and I had a function at the hotel that I was coordinator for. I had to be there no way around it. The inspection went really well. There are some minor things, but what house is perfect? We need to put an electrical outlet in the bathroom since there isn't one. We also will be moving the dishwasher from the basement to the kitchen. Weird place to have a dishwasher but what can you do? We are now hammering out the purchase and sale contract. We should have that done some time tomorrow. Closing will be April 20th with a clause for them to extend it 30 days if need be. I need to kick the moving into high gear because before you know it Bam it is gonna be time. I am going to start this weekend with pictures and knick nacks, you know the dust collectors and work my way from there.

Jayden woke up about 3:30 this morning gagging and throwing up. Why do they always get sick in the middle of the night? He was whiny and clingy and unhappy most of the day. Poor thing couldn't keep a thing down. Then about an hour before I need to go to work he is able to keep water down. Daddy has him now and he is fine happy and giggling. Ate a whole bottle too with no throwing up in sight.

So much going on

2009-03-05T09:50:00.003-05:00

I have so many thoughts swirling around in my brain right now that I thought a famous bullet post might be in order. Come on you know you love them.

I am pretty sure I am getting sick
Of course this would happen now
I am event coordinating a function on Saturday
I have to be there for the set up
We have our home inspection on Saturday as well
Today is my parent teacher conference with Terrell's teacher
I need to find out how close to the end of the school year we can close without him needing to transfer schools
I need to write a $400 check to the attorney who will be helping us with our home purchase
I am scared to death about the amount of money we have to come up with
$7200 for the down payment
Another $5000 or $6000 for closing
plus all that stuff you don't always thing about like
$850 for the lawyer
a new fridge and a washer dryer
Curtains I mean I know I can get away with just shade for a while
Oil, we heat with oil in these parts and a few days before closing someone will go stick the tank to see how much oil is in it
Yeah we have to pay for that at closing
Homesteaders act. Although our 1st time homebuyer class told us it costs on $35 and to do it ourself at city hall
At closing they try to make you do it for upwards of $200
Home insurance
Packing
Unpacking
The kids adjusting
Me adjusting
We have lived here 10 years as a married couple I will be sad to leave
I got the doctor to give me a new prescription for Zoloft
Now I just need to fill it
T needs a haircut
J needs pajamas
Anyone got some 12 month pajamas they aren't using?
Did I mention I am getting sick????

Ok I think that is enough rambling for one day.

House

2009-03-01T20:18:00.006-05:00

Well for those of you that don't read my sister's blog or are my friend on facebook I have some news. We put an offer on a house Saturday and they accepted. I am beyond excited and nervous as hell. It is a pretty cape with 3 bedrooms, 1 bath, finished basement and a den. It is move in ready and I am in love! Nice back yard for the kids and a quiet little side street.

I love my front walk

The Man room AKA my basement

My very blue bathroom, but hey it ain't pink!

This house was owned for 30 years by the same people. We actually met the man when we went to see the house. He was very sweet. You can tell the home has been well cared for and loved by them. I am excited to have a place to raise my boys. Now lets hope home inspection goes well. Closing will be some time in April or May. We told him we were flexible with that since he needs to find a place to live. Plus that way T can finish the school year here in Winthrop.

Night waking

2009-02-27T20:27:00.001-05:00

You would think with a title like the one above I was going to post about the baby. Well you would be wrong. It seems that lately Terrell has been waking up in the middle of the night. The other night Tony heard the TV on around 10:30pm or so and T was up. He thought it was early in the morning. A few days before that he was up around 5 watching kappa Mikey in Nicktoons. We have since told him if he wakes up and it is still dark he needs to check the clock. If it is not at least 5 he needs to go back to bed. Let's see how this works out.

9 month Appointment

2009-02-26T08:39:00.001-05:00

We had his well baby check up the other day. He is doing great. Weight is 22 pounds 1 ounce.74% for weight. He is 29.8 inches tall, 91% for height. His head is little though, 17.6cm, 35%. He is doing all the things he should be and then some. The doctor could not believe how fast he crawls, or that he is pulling up and cruising already. He said he would not be surprised if Jayden walked really soon. All in all it was a great appointment with no shots!

9 months old

2009-02-23T08:13:00.002-05:00

Today my little J man is 9 months old, he ha been in the world as long as I carried him inside. It is slightly surreal to me. He is getting so big and doing so many things now that I long to slow him down. He is my last baby and it seems like time is just slipping through my fingers like sand.

He can now:

wave hi
slap 5
cruising pretty good now
crawls at lightening speeds
cries if I leave the room
his face just lights up when he sees Daddy
loves to play wrestle with his brother
pets the cat

He is not standing on his own yet but I know it is coming because a few times this weekend he let go for a second and then fell to his butt. He is a joy but he is also clingy, cries when he does not get his way. Still is crying himself to sleep but we are down to about 10 minutes of crying now. Once we get him settled into going to sleep on his own he is getting out of our room and back in with brother. All in all he is perfect and I can not imagine our lives without him.

Good things and bad dreams

2009-02-21T13:35:00.002-05:00

We went this afternoon and met with a Realtor. We liked him immediately and have decided he is the one who will help us find our first home. His name is Jonathan and his parents own the agency. So you know he was taught by the best. We are going to spend this week finding houses we would like to see and go look next weekend. I am so excited to finally really be starting this journey.

In the bad dream department I had a really bad one this morning. I dreamed that the boys were in the tub and for some reason I was in the other room. When I came back into the bathroom Jayden was floating in the water. I screamed and scooped him out, I was trying to give him CPR and call 911 all at the same time. It was so real and frightening, I woke up in a pool of sweat breathing heavy. I was crying too. I wonder what the hell it means? I never want to have another dream where one of my kids die, it was so real and so scary.

My sweetie

2009-02-18T09:27:00.002-05:00

Terrell was so sweet this morning. He heard his brother wake up, came into my room and said Mommy I will take him in the other room so you can sleep. How cute is that? Of course I got up anyway but I let him think for a few minutes that he was baby sitting. We then made yummy blueberry pancakes in little circles for breakfast. Even Jayden liked them. So far it has been a good day.

Honest Scrap meme

2009-02-17T07:51:00.003-05:00

Delenn awarded this to me, Thanks Delenn

The rules for this award:

Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.
Show the winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with “Honest Scrap.” There’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon.

List at least 10 honest things about yourself.
The list:

1. I sometimes slack at work because I can.

2. I can not stand one of my husbands best friends son. He just irks the hell out of me.

3. I long for a husband that is more demonstrative of his love.

4. Sometimes I pretend I don't hear the baby just so I don't have to get up.

5. I hate cleaning the toliet.

6. I am now addicted to House.

7. Terrell loves to watch it too.

8. I have thought about what I would do if my husband died.

9. I am scared to death to buy a house.

10. I hate driving in the snow, it scares me.

My 7 blog recommendations (please go visit them):

My Sister Zephra

Sarah ~ She just had a positive pee stick

Nancy ~ is having a run of bad health and she just had a baby

CeCe ~ girl friend is crazy and I love to read her

Mrs. Schmitty ~ Her whole family makes me laugh

Monogram Queen ~ She is a queen and has a crown, do I need to say more?

Rachel ~ She is a SMBC and has a cute son and daughter

Fun in Boston

2009-02-16T22:12:00.006-05:00

I took the boys into Boston today for a Mommy date. We had a blast, we visited Auntie Susan at Faneuil Hall and then went over to the Boston Common. We played at the playground and watched the skaters on Frog pond. It was a little chilly but oh so nice to feel the sun on my face. I go back to work tomorrow, oh well only 4 days until I am off again.

Addiction

2009-02-10T22:25:00.002-05:00

It seems that I might have a new addiction, Facebook. Yup I have jumped on that band wagon. If you are also on Facebook please feel free to look me up. I would love to be your friend. One thing I have not done on FB is put my blog out there. Some people do not know of the blog and I would like to keep it that way. I can not imagine my Step Mom reading my blog, in fact that thought creeps me out a little. Anyway come play with me on my new favorite spot on the web.

Bath time fun

2009-02-08T20:22:00.002-05:00

Bullets Again!

2009-02-02T17:36:00.003-05:00

I have all kinds of stuff on my mind so I figured a bullet post was due.

Terrell turns 6 in 72 days!
Jayden turns 1 in 110 days.
I turn 39 in umm just forget that!
Seriously we are gonna buy a house.
I am scared shitless.
Found out we might be eligible for down payment and closing cost assistance depending on what city we buy in.
Sitting on a hard wood chair for 5 hours is not good for a bad back.
Buying a house is really freaking complicated.
The whole octuplet mom thing pisses me off
Her doctor and or clinic was irresponsible
it gives a bad look to all who use ART
My doctor freaked about putting 3 back
I am addicted to House
I love Hugh Laurie
I am still not sure what to do about my Dad.
I did call and will most likely call again tomorrow
I just don't want to have him die and then wish I had called him more often
At least it will be snowing here again tomorrow so we will have something to talk about

2009-01-29T20:42:00.000-05:00

We have another tooth. Top right front tooth has finally popped through the gum. Maybe now this kid will get some relief.

Dad

2009-01-27T16:12:00.003-05:00

My Dad is going to die. Not today or tomorrow or even a month from now but it is going to happen. Most likely sometime this year. I am having a hard time processing that. My step mother was pulled aside by their Doctor yesterday and told to prepare herself. My sister called me and told me, I was in Stop and Shop at the time and to be honest I almost started to cry right there. I had to get off the phone immediately. The thing is I know his time is short and yet it has been weeks since I called him. Weeks people. Something is holding me back, it is like I don't feel a connection to him. When we do talk we have nothing to say. I mean how much can you talk about the weather? We never talk about anything important, if I was to ask about my Mom or talk about how bad my childhood was he would just close up. He is going to be gone and no one will have the answers I or my sister need to have. I just don't know why I can't pick up the phone and call, is it that I really have not forgiven him for the past? Is it the fact that we were estranged for so long that I don't really feel like I have a parent? How sad is that? I have no parents that really care about me. I mean I know my Dad loves me but sometimes I wonder if he cares or even knows how to care? Tell me why am I having such a hard time making myself pick up that phone?

Christmas Pictures

2009-01-25T10:23:00.005-05:00

Better late than never!

8 months old

2009-01-23T16:04:00.002-05:00

Jayden today you are 8 months old. I can not believe how fast you are growing up. Here are some of the things he can do in bullet form.

Crawl
Cruise the furniture
Love to pet the cat
Pulls hair
Has 2 bottom teeth
Is working on his 2 top teeth coming in
Blows raspberries
Love to splash in the tub
Eat
He love baby food but he loves big people food more
Says ah da for daddy
Says tttt we think it is for brother but who knows
Loves to scream back and forth to you
When he sees his daddy his face just lights up

I am so in love with him. Now if he would just sleep through the night, preferably in his own bed.
Any ideas? Cry it out is not really an option cause brother and Daddy both need sleep to go to school and work the next day. He sleeps with us, either in our bed or in our room in the pack and play.

New home?

2009-01-22T18:07:00.002-05:00

We are in the very beginning stages of buying a house. I am scared and excited at the same time. W have started the process for an FHA loan. We need to go to a 1st time home buyer class. 2 Saturdays from 9-1. The application makes my head hurt and Tony is grumpy. I know it is because he is nervous too. This is such a big step for our little family. I do look forward to owning something and giving my kids a yard to play in and rooms of their own. More than anything though I want a big ass tub to soak in!

Bad Mommy Moment

2009-01-21T15:24:00.001-05:00

Today Jayden was asleep on my bed, well I thought he was asleep. He decided to crawl right off Mommy's bed. I heard a thud and went running. He banged his little head on the bed frame. His left eye is now swollen and a bit red. He cried for about a minute and then was perfectly fine. Have you ever tried to put ice on a 7 month old? Yeah doesn't work so well, he just wanted to eat it. He is fine now. Me not so much, I know accidents happen but it still sucks.

2009-01-19T22:20:00.002-05:00

I am in awe over what this country will be doing at Noon tomorrow. I never thought I would see this day in my lifetime. My son is so proud and walks around saying we have a black president Momma. Yes son we do, isn't life good? I am sure I will shed some tears just as I did today taking time to reflect on all Dr. King fought so hard for.

2009-01-12T10:56:00.003-05:00

I am sorry I have not been blogging. I just don't really have much to blog about. Each day is much the same as the one before. Work, eat, sleep, repeat. Terrell did say something yesterday that was telling though, We were watching a movie about Doris Duke. She had just given birth to a 3 pound premature baby girl, the doctor comes in and says I am sorry your baby died. OF course Doris Duke is crying and upset. T asked why she was crying. I told him and then he said well why doesn't she just have another one? My mouth dropped. At 5 years old already dismissing her pain. As a IF survivor it his comment made me cringe. We talked about how each life is special and that a Mommy and Daddy love all of there children.

Speaking of loving our children the jealousy has finally surfaced. T is down in the dumps about not always being first and how everyone loves Jayden more. We are working on it.

1st post of the new year

2009-01-05T12:28:00.002-05:00

and guess what? We have all been sick, sicker than sick. We all had strep throat and really bad colds. I still managed to work NYE and NYD but I did not feel good doing it. We all got on medicine and are starting to feel better but we are still not 100%. I forgot how much it sucks being sick and still needing to take care of kids. With all of us sick we took turns. Everyone got a chance wallow in there own sickness and I will admit it I did not take a shower for 3 days. We all smell much better now too. Off to work again today, we are hoping to be 100% by the weekend.

My year in review

2008-12-30T20:55:00.002-05:00

I saw this on someone else's blog and thought it was a cool idea. I can not for the life of me remember where I saw it so if it was your blog let me know and I will give proper credit.

So without further ado here is a favorite blog post of mine from each month of the past year.

Results ~ Jan.08

Moving ~ Feb.08

Meat? ~ March 08

5 years old ~ April 08

Look what I made! ~ May 08

Graduation ~ June 08

Devastated ~ July 08

Zip Trip ~ Aug. 08

Kindergarten ~ Sept. 08

Weekend ~ Oct. 08

Parenting Tip # 654 ~ Nov. 08

Watch out ~ Dec. 08

So there you have it my favorite posts of 2008. Happy new year to you all.

ICLW

2008-12-27T13:08:00.002-05:00

I signed up to do ICLW this month. It runs from the 21st to the 28th, what the hell was I thinking? I feel so bad, I have missed reading other blogs. I have not done my commenting duties, I have been a slacker. I just feel like I have no time. The tree is down, the ornaments put away and the stockings de stocked. My living room looks big and empty. You see the coffee table leg broke on Christmas eve, So now we have a big open space. This is most likely a good thing since Jayden is crawling all over the place. Not to mention pulling up. This makes one less thing he can bump his head on. Went to Bob's stores today and got T a Patriots window light up decoration for his room and got myself a Patriots chair. I can't wait to use it next year. Now we are home and I am going to do laundry and relax if possible.

Christmas 2008

2008-12-25T15:33:00.002-05:00

Merry Christmas to you all. It is after 3 now and I am at work. I love love love going to work after the busy busle this morning. Terrell was so happy this morning, he loved his hot wheels race track and his slinky. Who knew that a $1 toy would be such a big hit. I will be uploading pictures in the next day or so. Tony got me american idol karoke for the PS3. It is fun and I can't wait to play it again. Jayden loved the wrapping paper and not much else. Off to do some work now.

My Boy

2008-12-23T10:35:00.001-05:00

Terrell is the sweetest little boy ever! At the coffee shop this morning someone asked him what he wanted for Christmas. After his usual answer he also said I want my brother to have a fun day. AWWWWW

Sick

2008-12-22T12:41:00.003-05:00

Jayden is still not feeling good and it is starting to catch up to me. Once I finally made it home last night he decided it was a good idea to wake up. You can't blame the poor little guy he is just miserable. Now I feel like I am getting sick. Thankfully whatever was bothering Tbone yesterday seems to have cleared up. Hoping we will all be better for the Christmas eve dinner and Christmas morning craziness. Have you gotten everything done for your holiday celebrations?